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Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep.
Everything in life is relative, ask Einstein.
Why is a false eye made of glass?…..To look through.
The jogger who overslept found himself running late.
Blackmail: "When you do not give me the raise I will tell everyone you did give me one."
Why did God create the man first and only afterwards the woman? …. To give him the chance to enjoy heaven on earth for just a few moments.